Gathering Gold

Connecting with Ancestors

“I can tell you the names of Taylor Swift’s parents, but not my great-grandparents.”

Can you relate to Victoria’s admission in today’s episode?

Many of us have lost connection with our ancestors. Or rather, that connection was severed even before we were born, by cultural conditions that de-prioritize relationships in general, and familial bonds in particular. 

And: connecting to the unseen realm of ancestors goes beyond learning about our genealogy. We can draw strength and comfort from imaginal grandmothers, mythological archetypes, and even fictional characters that have helped shape us into who we are or who we will become.

In today’s episode, Sheryl shares reflections on both why and how to re-connect with the branches and leaves of our family trees to find new, ancient allies in the unseen realm. 

Let your ancestors hold your worry, offer you their prayers, and anchor you in this autumnal season when the veil between the living and the dead is thin.

References:

• Coco (2017)

• James Martin, Jesuit priest

• Lalah Delia

• “Dancing in the Dark” Bruce Springsteen

• "It Had to Be You," Tony Bennett

• “Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head,” B. J. Thomas

• "We Don't Talk About Bruno" from Encanto

Managing Overwhelm

Sometimes, it all feels like too much: too much responsibility, too many expectations, too much sensation, too many feelings, too much hyper-vigilance. In these moments, we can be enveloped by a feeling of overwhelm.

Sometimes, things really are just too much. Some things needs to give. Systems need to change.

And, sometimes we pause for a moment to scan our inner world and find that certain mindsets, storylines, and habitual patterns are exacerbating or even creating the sense of overwhelm. Perhaps there is an emotional undercurrent of turmoil related to past trauma, family patterns, or conditioning. Maybe our perfectionist is making every molehill into a mountain. Might we be resisting asking for or receiving help that could make a task more manageable?

In today's episode, we explore ways to sort through the various pieces of the overwhelm puzzle to help us carve a path forward when we are feeling stumped and stranded.

Bit by bit, piece by piece, you can do it. We know you can.

Rooting into Autumn

Meaning making. Connecting to breath. Aligning with nature. So many actions, big and small, can help us dig a little deeper into the soil of time, anchor ourselves against the buffeting winds of change and demands, especially as we shift into a new season.  

We recorded this conversation in front of a live virtual audience of Patreon community members, opening up the second half of the episode for group discussion on the topic of rooting into autumn. 

We are so grateful to the insightful, compassionate members who added their wisdom about steadying ourselves amidst the busy-ness of autumn.

How will you send some energy to your roots today?

References:

Rooted, by Lyanda Lynn Haupt

Resistance to Inner Work

We often resist doing things that we know are good for us—including inner work. We attend one therapy session and then stop showing up. We drag our heels on the way to yoga class. We let our journal grow dusty in the corner. Our resistance to change and to effort gets the best of our intention to grow.

Today, we are exploring some of the voices and characters of resistance—including the inner child, inner teenager, and Wise Self—as well as the hidden benefits within resistance. How can we work with the energy of digging in our heels or pushing up against something hard, and learn to embrace its vital role in our personal journey? This is what we are unpacking in today’s episode.

References:

• Sheryl's upcoming course: Break Free from Anxiety: A 9-Month Course on the Art of Living (registration open now; course starts September 22, 2024)
• Sheryl’s book The Wisdom of Anxiety
• A League of Their Own  (1992)

The Fear of Taking Risks

By nature or nurture, or some combination of the two, some of us are chronically risk averse–especially if we struggle with anxiety. While some cautiousness can be healthy, extreme risk aversion can keep us from engaging with the world deeply, living our values, and just plain enjoying life.

By taking risks, we learn more about ourselves and the world. And by learning more about ourselves and the world, we learn how to take more intentional, skillful, and enriching risks. 

In today’s episode, we explore some of the inner templates that make it challenging for us to take risks, and how we can reframe healthy risk-taking as an exciting part of life and an essential part of personal growth. 

References:

• Gathering Gold Patreon Community
• Recent episodes: "Why It’s Hard to Receive Good Things," "Adding Good Things," and "Living IRL"
• Perennials Podcast episode "Lights Up with Felicia Russell"

Living IRL

Our relationship with screens, digital devices, and online media is complicated. We can gain so much valuable information and connection in a more accessible way, but we can also get sucked into a vortex of information overload, analysis paralysis, social comparison, and doom scrolling. 

In today's episode, we discuss using our devices as tools to help us engage more deeply with the world, not as substitutes for living. We also discuss some of the blocks and obstacles that make it difficult to disengage with with online world: discomfort, awkwardness, and fear, to name a few. And we talk about the importance of living our values through intentional action, not just vicariously.

Whether planting a seed in a pot, having a courageous conversation with a loved one, or visiting a new city, we can always try something new and see what happens. We invite you to reflect with us on your own values and desires to engage with life IRL. 

Adding Good Things

In our last episode, we talked about why it can be hard to receive good things. Today, we are discussing the importance of actively adding good things to our lives. 

It can be easy to focus on all of the problems, challenges, and hardships we are facing, and to assume that if we could just remove those, then we could experience a greater sense of wellbeing. And while there are certainly times to focus on removal of things that are hurting us, there is also great power in pouring our attention into adding goodness: adding more fruits and vegetables onto our plate, adding more visits with friends, adding encouraging thoughts into our inner dialogue. And sometimes, we find that the more good things we add, the easier it is for old painful habits to fall away. 

This can, of course, bring up feelings of “easier said than done.” In today’s episode, we discuss how to work with some of the obstacles to adding good things, from self-judgment to low motivation. 

References:

• Recent Gathering Gold episodes: "Summer Solstice" and "Why it’s Hard to Receive Good Things"
• Pema Chödrön, “No big deal”
• Rob Bell’s podcast 
• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
• The Many Lives of Mama Love, by Lara Love Hardin
• Sheryl’s book, The Wisdom of Anxiety
• Carl Rogers’ teaching on unconditional positive regard

Why It's Hard to Receive Good Things

Today’s episode was requested by one of our lovely Patreon members, who asked us to talk about why it can be hard to receive good things, and how to do so with more ease.

In this conversation, we discuss some of the stumbling blocks to the unfettered gratitude that we desire: blocks including guilt, shame, fear, and distrust. And, we discuss how we can orient ourselves towards more receptivity, reciprocity, courage, and openheartedness.

References:

It’s a Wonderful Life (1946)

Robin Wall Kimmerer’s upcoming book, The Serviceberry: Abundance and Reciprocity in the Natural World

Gilmore Girls

Perennials Episode 61: Embracing Weakness with Shannon K Evans